Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
