Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
The chlamydia really affected his face.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
