OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
