Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
