Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
