That's intense
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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