Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Rumble strips road head = magical
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
