I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
