There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Randomize
