Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
