I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
It's Friday. Sex?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
