So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
