Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
