he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize