Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
