it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
