How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
