he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I love having hate sex.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
