brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
