I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
