The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Randomize
