I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
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