all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
