wrigley field is MILF paradise
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
