so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I intend to get homeless drunk
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
