Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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