If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
