new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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