I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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