I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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