I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
