I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
