Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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