If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
