i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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