theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
