okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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