If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I can text with my tongue
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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