Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
