I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize