Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
