I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
