She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
