I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
