Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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