i don't like sucking hair
i just had sex bonerless
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
