Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
