u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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