Sry I called you an 8
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
