Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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